Hormones

One of the great things about having a partial hysterectomy is that you don't have to endure the monthly curse! One of the great things about having five kids is you are pregnant or breastfeeding for so long that you basically escape the better part of your adult life without having a period. So between the pregnancies, breastfeeding and surgery I have led a relatively good hormonal life!

I remember going into the hospital and telling the nurses that I was giving myself a birthday present. It was the gift that would keep on giving! No periods ever again. Of course, I am one of those really lucky people who never had bad periods. I never missed a day of school or had to take medication. It was all really more just the inconvenience of it all that I dreaded. One more thing to do. Not like my friend Amany. She has the periods that come straight from Hell. That is a post in and of itself.

I even got my bladder put back in its original location as an added bonus. This would be important later on if I decided I wanted to compete in the Olympics in the trampoline event. I never knew that if your uterus was pushing your bladder out that jumping would cause urine to leak!!! Who knows this stuff? Know how I found out?

Well I went to a cookout and all the kids were jumping on the trampoline and they wanted me to jump too. So I was all over it. I jumped and jumped and laughed. Just like a kid! Then it was my turn to sit out and I sat on the side and when I got up there was a wet spot. I wonder what I sat in? I looked around and there were no other spots on the trampoline. Hmmm...so I went into the bathroom to see if I got it on my clothes and there was this GINORMOUS wet spot. It looked like I sat in about a 3 foot wide section of something. So I had to pee and lo and behold when I got my britches down my undies were soaked. Lightening bolts struck and thunder clashed and I realized I had peed my pants!!!

Why am I talking about hormones? Because my beautiful daughter Mallory who does all things right except for once a month when she becomes Malaria. She can be a real pill. She cries and gives these looks that can turn you to stone if you are not careful! Once I was a Mom statue for almost a week! Thank God the curse was lifted and I was returned to flesh and blood. All the rest of the kids darn near starved!

I am making light of her pain. When in reality, when I started to write this post I was thinking about tucking her into bed. How nice it was when I sat on her bedside before she fell asleep and I stroked her hair and she told me she had a headache (probably from all the crying) and I asked her in my nicest mama voice if she had washed her face because I was concerned about the zit constellation that was forming in her cheek galaxy! She hadn't and so I suggested she might want to. Then I thought that as much as I was grateful for my hormonal free life, I would take all that pain and trouble every month for her if I could. She looked so defeated. Mascara smeared under her little bloodshot eyes. She has beautiful eyes.
I love you Mal-Mal! I love you Malaria! I wish I could take it all away for you.
Bye for now.