All In Good TIme My Pretty

The Wizard of Oz was on tonight. I have a confession to make. I have watched that movie a bazillion times. Yes, really, a bazillion times. How I failed to notice in the last 40 years that Dorothy's relatives were in fact the Lion, the Scarecrow and the Tin man I do not know???!!!! I think it was last year I realized maybe the year before. But no matter, I should have noticed a lot sooner!

I consider myself to be pretty observant, but I missed that. What else have I missed out on? Really at this time of year, it is the time to be wondering about all that you have- not what you have missed! I have so very much! I have five healthy, hormonal teenagers! I know they have healthy lungs because they used to cry like it was a sporting event and they were competing for a medal! Gold medal winners every one of em! I have a home, a car-two cars actually. I have so many friends and acquaintances. I can walk down State Road 64 any day of the week and there are so many friendly people out there that I can feel loved just from the 8 mile stretch! They wave and smile-I don't know most of them, but it doesn't matter. I feel like I do.

I have a job-a crazy one sometimes but a job! I get to help people which is always nice. I have missed somethings in life but I am sure glad for all the things I haven't missed!

Angels While They Sleep

Well this is probably the fifth night in a row that I have gone to look in on Macy after bedtime and found her in a weird way. Last night she fell asleep with her shoes and clothes on! Here she is tonight. Be forewarned-she is not alone!I am not sure if you can see it as clearly as I did when I walked in, but she is hanging off the side of the bed. That would be her bottom portion. Also, amidst all those stuffed animals, there are two real cats. Jimbob is the one I woke up taking the picture. O'Malley is the big gray blob towards the front. She is going to have a sore hand from the way she is bending her hand! Not to mention the potential for a fall in the middle of the night!Now here is Zachary. Doesn't he look comfy? He should. He is in my bed!!! He needs to get out!!!
By the way-that date thing-ignore it. It is still November 2008! He sure looks like an angel when his mouth is closed. The really humorous thing about this photo? He was literally telling me less than two minutes prior how he could not fall asleep unless I made him a snack. That he was SOOOO hungry he would never fall asleep. SO being the good mom that I am, I walked to the kitchen and started a cheeseburger on the stove for him. Note exhibit A below!

The time it took for me to make a hamburger patty and walk back to the room and tell him it was cooking, he was unconscious! Kids! I have to laugh. Now what am I going to do with the burger? I am not the least bit hungry! Just look at him..

Isn't he just angelic? Wait till I try and wake him up. Then he will be a different story. Maybe I will just sleep in his bed. His mother needs to tell him to shave and it would appear a trim is in the future of this young man. At least by the ears. I sure love the little guy. He is taller than me now, but he will always be my little guy!!!! Mallory should not be excluded from this exercise in humiliation, however, I went into her room to take the picture and she is buried under the covers. You cannot even tell there is a person in her bed.

My kids sleep so sound that I can vacuum next to their bed while they sleep and they will not wake up! Scary! Well the burger is done so I suppose I shall go do something with it. Maybe he can have it for breakfast! Sweet dreams my angels.

If You Don't Have Something Nice to Say....

I have not written in sometime. This is due to many circumstances, none of which have been enjoyable. I love to write about things going on in my life, but not really the bad things or the negative things. I feel like there is enough of that on the news so I try to keep this more upbeat and positive.

As my Mom always said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." So I have been quiet. But here I am, back in the swing of things. I will give you a small sampling of some of the things that have been going on. Last post was hurricane Ike. That sums up no power, water, phone or food. Garage and roof damage totaling hmmm $2300 dollars. The loss of all food in my deep freeze and two other freezers! Then there were all the trees that were destroyed by wind gusts. Well my experience with one tree caused a horrendous case of poison ivy which after three visits to the doctor and one to the hospital is still haunting me. Two of my kids had it also but they managed to get by with one doctor visit each!

Then there were the eye opening parental moments that I have endured which were truly the low points in my parenting repoirtire up to this point. I hope to never have to deal with some of the things that I have in the last two months, ever again. EVER. That being said, I have reached down very deeo for some inspiration, hope and have called on my faith to muster up the strength to move forward.

Here I am.

Hurricane Ike

Well I will post pictures later today, but my failure to post has been directly related to the lack of electricity. And water. And phone service. And cable. Did I mention that my kids are not pioneers in any sense of the word? Okay, so maybe I am not a pioneer that should have children. No power is fine by me, but having a house full of children and candles and oil lamps around with fire shooting out of them, ON PURPOSE, well it just does not sit well with me. Made me a nervous wreck.

Kids really don't know how to spend time without electronics these days. My son Zachary is absolutely beyond words just two days into this sans electricity thing. I really feel like I could string him up from a tree if there were any trees left standing on my property. So I did what any sensible mother would do. Or any single mother would do. I took him to his Dad's house. :o)

My roof on my garage is missing, well parts of it are missing. There is wood showing which is not a good thing. Shingles are laying with their back side showing (how embarrassing) and well my water line conveniently snapped in true hurricane fashion. Go IKE! I was thinking of the Hillshire Farms commercial "go meat" and that is where that came from. There are shingles from the roof on my house laying helter skelter throughout my yard.

There are leaves everywhere, and I am really having major concerns about the way fall may turn out. I love summer, it is my favorite. But fall is so beautiful. Usually. When a hurricane doesn't blow through at 81 mph and ripping the leaves off the trees like a stripper in heat! But no sense worrying just yet. I once took pictures of the same leaves every week for four months just so I could compare the change. That gives you an idea of how much I love the change of color in the fall.

Hurricane Ike hit southern Indiana, it was dry here. My sister lives in St. Louis and they had a deluge of rain. I am glad it was dry and just wind damage because I can only imagine what it would look like if it was raining here as well. Thank you God for the small blessing!!!

Stars Hollow

Do you ever wish you had grown up in one place all of your life and that everyone knew you and everything about you? I am watching Gilmore Girls, the television show, but on DVD. I have this little weird thing about me, I don't watch television. It is not that I have anything against television. I just don't have the lifestyle that condones watching a television series. Or maybe it is better to say that I don't have the personality it takes to miss an episode of a television series.

I feel like missing an episode of a series is like having mismatched sheets. It makes me feel weird inside. I am going to have to tell you that I am probably a little OCD. My sisters used to come and visit and make jokes about the way my soup labels lined up. Okay, I just read what I wrote so far and maybe I am a little ADD too. See the apples don't fall far from the tree. God bless my children.

Anyway, I am watching Gilmore Girls and this not my first time, just so we are all on the same page. But with every episode I must confess I want to move there. I want to drink coffee at Luke's or should I say Williams Hardware and I want to celebrate the many festivals they have. I think it is kind of cool how everyone knows everything about each other. Oh well. I also have to be honest and say that I looked forward to each and every move. My Dad worked for the government and we got transferred around like army brats! I loved meeting new people and making new friends. But there is just something about Stars Hollow. And Luke.

A Visit From My OIdest Son

Tonight my son Kenny called me and he was feeling a little down. He lives in Louisville with his Dad. I thought he ought to come over and hang out with me. That would surely cheer him up. As we talked he told me about the gas prices getting ready to soar through the roof. He wanted to come hang out with me but hey, he is a starving student with nothing more than vapors in his gas tank.

I bribed him with gas. Is that wrong? Come hang out with me and I will fill your gas tank. We had so much fun going from station to station trying as a team not to get screwed too bad. We finally found gas for $3.99 which for all practical purposes a bargain. I mean there is a hurricane that might hit and might damage some oil wells and that might cause a shortage so I can definitely see where it would be important to raise the price of gas. That is a lie. Never mind that gas was $3.64 yesterday and I have seen no gas trucks. So the gas in the pumps is still the $3.64 gas. So we both fill up and then we go to Wal-Mart. Wal-Mart is where everyone goes in the middle of the night when they cannot sleep. Or when they want to show their son a good time. At least my son. My kids love going to Wal-Mart. They are so weird.

Guess what? We stopped one gas station too soon. We found gas for $3.85 across from Wal-Mart. Man I hate getting ripped off!! But on the bright side of things, Kenny and I had fun at Wal-Mart. We got some chips and went home and made queso and watched the movie "Vantage Point" which was really good. Kenny and I had a wonderful time and I hope he doesn't wait to long to visit again. He is all grown up yet he still calls me mommy. Warms the heart I tell you!

Pizza Dough

My mom makes the BEST homemade pizza ever. Period. As kids, we all wanted her pizza for special occasions. When we come home now as adults, we want Mom to make her pizza. Right now though, I just want my mom to come to my house and stay until I can make two consecutive batches of dough without ruining one.

Last night I tried to make a batch and I ruined it. This is like standard operating procedure for me. I ruin one batch and then I make one right. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG PEOPLE??? It just pushes every button on my OCD elevator right to the top. I do it the same way each and every time but it is like the Gods of Dough are out to get me. Dough in your face girlie!!!

I love my Mom's pizza but when I make it myself, I put a lot more toppings on it. In fact, whenever I make any recipe of my Mom's I find myself adding more meat. She must be one of the vegetarians that has never really come out of the closet. Or maybe I have issues...I just love the meat. I crave hamburgers no bun, just the burger. I don't crave chips or ice cream I crave BEEF! It's whats for dinner you know!

Anyway, now that the world is aware of my dough frustrations, I will digress. That means I will shut the hell up about it! AMEN.

Sisters

My daughter is the most vicious soccer player EVER! Okay well maybe not really, but she is out for blood! Yesterday they played the rival school and was it ever ugly. I am not sure why some refs just don't call anything but it looked like Monday Night Football instead of high schoool GIRLS soccer.

I for one will never say girls can't be tough but holy cow! There were elbows flying and faceplants of olympic magnitude out there! I could not help but praise our coach who got a yellow card for yelling smash them! Smash them girls-don't let them beat on you like that!!!

They so had it coming. Pushing my daughter around and pushing my other daughter around. Mallory and Macy both were like two twisters on an open prairie ready to kill. When you push one sister you can bet the other one is coming after you!!!!! OOOOOHHHH...it is so nice to see them bond this way. I am so proud.

Okay, my adrenaline has slowed down and I am going to tell my girlies that violence is not the answer.

Unless you ask the question "What should you do when someone tries to hurt your sister?"

Zachary the Pimp

My son Zachary is 12 years old. He will be 13 next month. Anyone who knows Zachary at all, knows that until just recently, he was my other half. My oldest son Kenny may have put it to words the best. Zachary is or was a titty baby. If I had to drive three blocks to take my daughters to cheerleading practice, he was riding shotgun. If I walked out to my car to get something he would be yelling out to me "are you leaving" before I could get to the door. That would be in his panicky voice whereby he thought he might be left unattended for more than 30 seconds.

All of my children would tell me that I needed to make him grow up and quit babying him. I kept insisting he would grow up on his own. He would sleep in my room on my nights off and I would let him stay up late and we would watch movies. Sometimes we would even sneak off to Dairy Queen for a late night brownie earthquake or a double cheeseburger. He thought I was the bomb. That was then. This is now.

MOM: Zachary, we are going out for chinese, want to come?
SON: No, will you bring me back some sesame chicken and a chicken and broccoli?
MOM: Sure, we will be gone awhile are you sure you don't want to come?
SON: No. I think I will stay here.
MOM: Okay, I love you. Hey Zachary, I said I love you.
SON: Oh, I love you too Mom.

Can you say invasion of the body snatchers? The really weird thing is this. Our phone rings off the hook. Constantly. Every call is for him. All girls, all the time. So I decided to mention to Zachary that I was thinking of yanking the phone out of the wall. He tells me that he is a pimp. I am aghast. WHAT? What do you mean? He explains to me that all the girls like him because he is so sweet and he talks to them about what boys like and don't like, so he has amassed a large girl posse that calls constantly.

As the mother of a titty baby gone pimp this is what I have to say.

CCCCCCCCCCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEE BBBBBAAAACCCKKKK!!!!
Come back titty baby I miss you. I am sick of the phone ringing. I liked it better when you would cry if I went anywhere without you. Please tell your friends that you already promised your mom to live with her forever. Tell them she needs someone to go shotgun on a late night DQ run.

Connecting to Music and Movies

I love so many different types of music and so many different types of movies. I have been dubbed the proverbially "sappy chick" yet I love movies like "Running Scared" and "Colors" and can jam to tunes from Ozzy as well as John Denver. I think that I am drawn to such different music and movies because of emotion.

If I am feeling sad, I am more likely to watch "Hope Floats" or "While You Were Sleeping" but if I am straight up depressed I will reach for the likes of "Catch and Release" or "Steel Magnolias" on my DVD shelf. If I am feeling peppy I will watch "Rush Hour" or "Catwoman".

With music it is much more obvious. I love country music. But if I am mad there are only a few country songs that will do the trick. I need music like White Stripe or Metallica or AC/DC. I actually have a CD that I made for just such an occasion. I also have a CD that I made for when I am happy and sad.

I am narrow minded when it comes to choosing music, but I am lucky. My kids are instinctive when they know I will like a song. They will tell me to listen and they are right 99.9 percent of the time. They help me to branch out and listen to new things. Otherwise, I might still be listening to the Carpenters!

Today my daughter sent me a text message as we passed each other on the road and she told me to turn my station. I did and I got to listen to a bubblegum station playing Miley Cyrus. But I actually liked the song. It is a good thing I have kids...I just keep telling myself they have all kinds of benefits.

Fall

My kids went back to school August 7, 2008. It used to be that the start of school meant fall was here, Now it is more like we are in the neighborhood. It is just starting to get cooler at night. I smell leaves burning. I live in the country and that is allowed for those of you who live somewhere that it isn't kosher. But more importantly, I KNOW fall is close when football season starts. I am hoping to play fantasy football again this year, it makes the season that much more exciting! However the person that usually directs the league I played in has other obligations this year, so I am not sure what will happen there.

Fall. School starts and then you get the onslaught of Halloween decorations and hay bales and oh the corn stalks!! The aisles at any store are stocked with both school supplies, costumes and candy. Haunted Houses will begin opening and there will be spook runs and bonfires. There will be football games to attend that you will start out sweating and by the 4th quarter you will need a sweatshirt.

I love that the air conditioner can be turned off and the windows opened. I love summer, it is my favorite because I love to be outside. But there is just something about fall that almost ties it for favorite. I love that sometimes you can wear a sweater and sometimes it is still so warm that you can wear shorts until November. There is usually one channel that plays nothing but scary movies for a month straight! My kids are really too old to trick or treat, but sometimes they do anyway. I still enjoy the thrill of it all.

I love making chili in the fall and meatloaf and baking cookies because the kitchen won't be too hot. There is the Harvest Homecoming Festival to look forward to also and of course the World Series. For televison junkies there is the start of the new television season. Oh and I can't forget the mums. I love all the beautiful fall colored mums that are sold during the fall. The leaves will be changing and the drives I take will become as colorful as my favorite sweater. It is jsut around the corner!

Middle Age

Okay, I am 41 today and I am thinking about my life. I guess birthdays and New Year's Eve are the two times of year I take stock of my life. What have I done, what did I want to get done and what do I have left to do? Life is really like a to do list. Survive high school, go to college, get a job, get married, have children and so on. No one really plans on getting divorced. That was one of those things that got put on the list in crayon because there was no pen to be found. It was also written on the back of a paper towel.

There are many things I have left to do. For instance, I want to win the powerball and make everyone I know debt free. It is a goal of mine. I keep plugging away a dollar a week. I want to go to Italy. I want to travel throughout the United States and see everything that each state has to offer. I want to live happily ever after. I sure hope I get to do some of those things.

I feel like I have had a decent life, I certainly have a lot left to accomplish, my stamp room needs some major attention. I need some major attention. HAHA!!! But all in all I am grateful for all I have, I have been through and where it has brought me.

Thank you for participating in my life! Thank you God for all my blessings. Please know my shoulders are quite a bit smaller-I have lost weight. Thought you might have missed the memo!

Men REALLY ARE From Mars

I read that book "Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus" and I am here today to tell you that I believe it to be true. All men, doesn't matter the age, they are all aliens. They actually look like aliens when they are babies and when they are old men with hair sprouting from everywhere.

I have also read "He is Just Not That Into You" and "The Rules" all books that attempt to guide women in the scary territory we know as "the field" the dating field. Read the first one -the man tells some truth ladies. If he isn't calling he isn't interested. If he is not chasing you down he really is not interested. It has nothing to do with how bad he got burned in his last relationship. Men won't let a fish go do you think they are going to let a hot babe like you get away if they want you? No way!

I have my own opinions about dating. Men listen up. If you want to get a woman and keep her-be nice. Not kiss her ass nice, just nice. Although the ass kissing may come in handy for the days you forget. Put that one on the back burner. THINK before you speak. Women-THINK before you respond. Don't settle. If you are not getting what you want, there is no trick in the book that is going to change anyone. YOU CAN ONLY CHANGE YOU! I know it sucks but I didn't make the rules, God did. I am not about to argue. You can if you want. Just be prepared to have a flat tire at a bad time with your cell phone conveniently in roam!!

Women are not that complicated. Say something sweet, be affectionate and try, TRY, try to not say anything whether you are joking or not to put her in her place. We just don't need it. We know our places. Look around. Palin for VP. Clinton for President. SMILE, that was a joke. I have no desire to clean up after men (they have been in office for sometime now-it would take women alot of time to clean that mess up)at work.

I don't know why relationships are so hard between the sexes. I just know that they are. I know because women tell me daily what they have been put through. We have enough to deal with-what with the child rearing, working, laundry, chauffeuring, cooking and cleaning you guys are supposed to be our bright spots. So try not to rain on our parade and we will try to have sex every day. Kidding...just kidding.(I'm not but I didn't want to commit anyone else)

Inspiration

Do you ever wonder what inspires some people to greatness? For instance, Michael Phelps. What inspired him to be the Olympian swimmer that he is? I like to watch people and study what motivates them. My daughter Mallory is my best subject for observation. She is 15. She is in advanced classes and makes straight A's. She not only does well academically, but she lettered in four sports her freshmen year of high school. I have five children. What motivates and inspires her to perform at the level she does? What is different with her than the other four?

Tonight she had a soccer game, right after school. We walked in the door and she started asking me what we were eating for dinner. The next thing you know she has pulled my recipe book out and asked me if she could make spaghetti sauce from scratch. She amazes me every day.

I am inspired to be a good parent by many people. There is a couple at my kids school and they have ten children. I see them at sporting events, choir concerts, school programs and driving up and down the road daily. I figure if they can attend as many events as they do and always have a smile on their face-so can I! (Yesterday does not count as my children tried to kill me with will you and can I and I need)

I am inspired to do a good job at work from-oh wait. I am not inspired to do a good job at work by anyone or anything lately. No sense lying. Moving on. Exercise.

Truth be told I am motivated to exercise when I am stressed. Luckily I seem to have a windfall of stress in my life so I have been quite faithful with the exercising. I asked my boss what motivates him, as I have seen him running many times. I was inspired by his answer. He sees a 70 year old man running every day. Rain, snow or shine. From behind he has the legs of a 25 year old athlete but from the front he is a an older man. I think that is poetic.

Inspiration comes in many packages. What inspires you? Tell me, tell me I want to know!

Hurricane Season

While Hurricane Gustav and Hannah may be revving up down near Jamaica I feel like there is category five about to hit right here in Ramsey. If people tried to collectively collaborate at pissing me off they could not be more successful than they have this week.

I feel like my temper which can lie dormant like a good STD for years is about to blow like the top off a pressure cooker left unattended.

Here are some things I am left wondering. Why is it that when you say DON"T do something, kids feel like you are saying DO IT, DO IT? It is like when women say no and men hear yes. How does that happen? Are we speaking on alternate planes of the universe?

When you get two days off a week, why do coaches decide at the last minute to have a meeting over something that is not going to take place for three more months on the ONE day you have other things you need to do. Notice I said NEED. I NEED to clean my house, do laundry, pack boxes. I might WANT to cook dinner and eat and take a bath but those are things that are rapidly falling in the list of things that might get done next week.

My cell phone has decided it is not going to ring so I have missed a myriad of phone calls in the last few hours which is now a good thing. Because if I got a call from someone who only seems to find me amusing when they are intoxicated I would probably say something that I would only regret later. If my mother called me today I can assure you I would not be in a good place mentally to have a conversation about the weather with her let alone anything of substance. A phone call from someone asking for anything of me right now would surely end in carnage.

I have no vices. I clean when I am stressed and if I could get five minutes to myself today, I would have the cleanest house you ever saw. But since I can't clean I think I might take up drinking. I can take a drink in a cup to the meeting I am about to attend and maybe I will find it not nearly as aggravating as I do right now. Cheers.

The View from SR 64 EB

Today it was a whopping 95 degrees. I am one of those weird people that loves summer and I don't care how hot it is. I don't love humidity but I will take it over being cold any day of the week. I am at work right now and I have a heater under my desk set at high and a blanket over my lap. I freeze in air conditioning. Especially if I work with Bubba. Bubba likes his women hot and his rooms cold. Actually I have no idea how he likes his women but it sounded good. So I decided to walk from my house in the booming metropolis of Ramsey, Indiana to New Salisbury, Indiana. It is just under four miles. I needed some time to think, my house was full of kids and the weather was sunny.

As I walked I had many thoughts. My mind was firing like an AR-15. I started pondering life and here are some observations from the road. I have photos with some which I took with my phone. The first mile I walked I wondered why the hell there are no sidewalks in the country. The speed limit is 55 throughout the county unless otherwise posted. Sidewalks would be a major investment but think of all the pedestrians struck walking in the roads that would be saved. People either veer twenty feet over into oncoming traffic to avoid coming close to you or they come as close to you as possible as if to test your resolve. My resolve was solid. I have lots of insurance and a hospital stay would mean someone is bringing me meals and I could get some sleep.

People in rural areas are friendly. I am by birthright a Northerner. My ex-husband used to make cracks about how unfriendly Northerners were. Well I have to say that people in the country are more friendly. As I walked every other person that passed me, waved. Some people even smiled. Probably they were smiling because they thought I was nuts. Who walks in this weather? Only me. Who walks and runs where there are no sidewalks? Me. I had a lot on my mind.

For instance, what happened to Freddy the frog here? Well this is what happens when you walk in an area with no sidewalks. Oh and when it is 95 degrees outside. If Freddy had a supergirl hat like mine, he would have been okay. Gay, but okay. But he got scattered, smothered and covered like some hash browns from the Waffle House. He was the first dead thing I passed. Then there was a butterfly and this poor little bird.Country living is not for the faint of heart. I also saw a skunk but he looked like he could have been in an episode of CSI and I decided not to subject you to that.

I walked further and I noticed that there were a lot of trucks pulling boats. In fact I would say trucks outnumbered the cars 3 to 1. Which had me wondering how all these folks afford gas. I thought gas was outrageous and the country was struggling because of gas prices. Now, I am wondering if it is just me. Filling up the trucks would be bad enough but the boat too! I will stick with my Corolla.

As I continued on I found several socks-are they yours? I am so happy to finally know where socks go.I walked and walked and another thing I noticed that really bothered me was how much litter there was on the side of the road. Apparently they need to start showing that Indian commercial like they did when I was a kid. The one where the tear rolled down his cheek as he stood in a pile of garbage. Please put litter in its place!

One of the funniest things I saw was a glass jar. I know, what is so funny about a glass jar? Well there is this neat little candle shop in Corydon called Candles by Lisa. They have great smelling candles and what I really like about her shop is that you can bring any dish or jar to her and she will fill it with the candle of your choosing! Perfect for the person that has everything or when you just want to reuse a jar or dish. Anyway, someone reused her candle jar.

If only this jar could talk. Bye for now!

Morelli

"There are some men who enter a woman's life and screw it up forever." That is one of my favorite lines that describe the character Joseph Morelli. Morelli is a character in the books written by Janet Evanovich. The books are numbered. The first in the series is "One For The Money" and it is when I first started falling for this imaginary character. Some people have imaginary friends when they are young. I waited until I was a full fledge adult with sexual urges to have one. If Morelli were real I would do him. I am just keeping it honest here.

"He'd grown up big and bad, with eyes like black fire one minute and melt-in-your-mouth chocolate the next. He had an eagle tattooed on his chest, a tight-assed, narrow-hipped swagger, and a reputation for having fast hands and clever fingers." That is a description that makes you want to have an imaginary friend is it not? By the way, that is only page one of the first book and there are thirteen more already written!

I envision Morelli to look like a combination of Ken Wahl from the television show Wiseguy to something like one of the other eight million hot Italian guys that play in the movies.

If you haven't read the books-read em! You will want to kick my ass over Morelli. He is just that smooth "Cupcake!" I have shared my love for these books with many folks. My Corporal at work has a wife who loves to read. She was sick and so I suggested that he get her one of these books. Well needless to say she devoured them like anyone would with such a great imaginary friend. My Corporal likened these books to crack. His wife lent them to her Aunt and the same thing happened. Instantly you become hooked like a fat kid with cake. The books are not only funny-you will find yourself laughing out loud but they are also just good for the imagination. You can spend hours imagining about Morelli. What more could a girl want?

Ranger. Now that is another character in the series and another post. When you think of Ranger your sure to here Babe in your head and imagine a hot cuban popping in out of nowhere. Like I said...imaginary friends are really a GOOD thing!!!
Bye for now.

Wanton Waste

Here I am at work, and my house is empty. There are no children there. Unfortunately there is no me there either. I am here at work and the peace and quiet that is screaming through my house is falling on deaf ears. What a waste. There ought to be a law! I should be arrested for the wanton waste of peace and quiet. If my Grandma Zannini were alive she would tell you, "There are millions of parents out there who would die for some peace and quiet and here you are just wasting it!" Actually she worried more about those last little bits of soggy cereal and the banana you started eating out of desperation but could not finish because it really wasn't what you wanted to eat.

I sat here for a moment and thought seriously about pretending to vomit in the bathroom here at work. There would be no choice, I would have to go home. Maybe I can pretend to faint. If you pass out it is really bad form to stay at work, especially if you are supposed to help save people's lives. Most people prefer to be saved by conscious folks. At least that is what I hear.

Oh well. I will get off work and go home to a nice quiet house and maybe today I will actually sleep for six hours straight. That would be a real treat! My kids think that they are sneaky. Mallory will tiptoe into my room and get into my purse. She takes my car keys (no worries she isn't going to drive) and goes out to get my laptop. She brings it in my bedroom and sets it up-I hear none of this. Then she gets on the internet and plays music. She is a straight A student. Why she bothers to be quiet with the whole snatch and grab operation I will never understand. Once I raise my head up and look at her-guess what she does? She puts her hands across her eyes like a 3 year old as if she is preventing me from seeing her!!!!

I have a favorite saying. Kids-they just don't get it. And they don't. That is why mothers must put the curse on their children. If we don't tell them "You just wait until you have kids of your own" their kids will be born perfect and remain perfect for all time. We want better for our kids than what we have in every way but this. This is one time we want our kids to have it worse! That is what makes parenting worthwhile. Revenge. A dish best served cold!

Bye for now!

Welcome to the 21st Century

My sister Susan just got text messaging! Welcome to the world you technological virgin you! I can honestly say her talents don't lie with electronics. BUT she can play the guitar so that balances things out. Oh and she deals with sputum so she gets extra points for that.

I personally am enamored with electronics and technology. I love computers, stereos, mp3 players, walkie-talkies, tv's , VCR and DVD players. OH and DIGITAL CAMERAS!!!! I love them all! I like trying to figure out how to do stuff on them even though I am so retarded that I can't watch cable tv without the assistance of one of my kids. I am good with computers and horrible with the VCR/DVD situation mostly because of cable and the fact that one operates on one channel and then you have the whole ten remotes issue.

My son Zachary recently got an MP3 player which took me hours to get to work. Now that I sit here and write about electronics one might wonder why I like them because they are so challenging. I guess it is because when I finally figure them out I feel like I have done a jigsaw puzzle. 1,000 pieces all sky!!!!

I love to wander the aisles of Best Buy and Circuit City and the electronic section of any other department store just to see what they have come up with now! Here at my work, they have recently installed cameras all over the city through a homeland security grant. I can zoom in on a newspaper box and read the headlines from my little cubicle! How awesome is that! They have them all over and I can just sit back and do my job and watch what the city is doing!

I practically got divorced over a tv. Not really but I had you going! I bought a tv/vcr combo which I have to this day and my husband went ballistic. You would have thought I bought a new car. This from the man who gave me a shop vac for our anniversary. When we got divorced he tried to take it and I told him he must be smoking crack! All the yelling I had to endure made that tv mine and mine alone!

Bye for now!

Cat People

There are two kinds of people. Cat people and dog people. Meet Macy. She is the proverbial cat lady. Macy is one with cats. They follow her around like she has catnip on her hiney. It is the craziest thing you can imagine. Macy is pictured below, in her oneness with the cats she displays her cat like tendencies and shows her proud mama how she can do what Jimbob does. There is a basket on the soffit directly behind her in the photo which is Jimbob's ultimate destination. He sits in this perch until he feels the need to go to the backdoor and watch for any other cats. Jimbob is agoraphobic. She wants to go outside so bad but can't. Much like the scene in movie "Copycat"where Sigourney Weaver plays the agoraphobic and try as she might she can not get out the door to get away from the intruder. Toooo scared. Uh OH!



All cats are hers. Jimbob is really hers. I think Macy may have been involved in one of those alien abduction experiments. Meet Jimbob. She is psycho. She is afraid of other cats and will not go outside. IF she makes me mad and I throw her outside (see the Olympic event notation below) she heads straight for this one tree midway down the driveway and only Macy can get her down. She does some of that cat whispering stuff.
Jimbob is lying on Macy's bed, waiting for her to come home from school. If I don't leave her door open Jimbob has a fit until he I mean she can get in there. Jimbob is a she by the way. We have a disease in our family that keeps us from naming our cats gender appropriate names. I think it is something that Mallory has issue with because I named our dog, Jack and he is a boy. Anyway Jimbob waits for Macy to come home from school and then they play their daily game of tag. I swear. I would not lie. I would but not about something as important as this. Jimbob and Macy scamper about the house and Macy hides. Then Jimbob comes and finds her. They usually end up playing chase around the island in the kitchen. It is freaking like something out of a Steven King novel I tell ya!


Jimbob tree is the tree on the right, you see the corner of the electrical box sticking out? Right above is where Jimbob stays when he has been ejected from the household.



I am allergic to cats. This has not stopped two of them from taking up residency. O'Malley was a divorce gift from my ex-husband. I had come home from work one day to find that he had in his standard redneck fashion left the cat in my garage. O'Malley is also known as "Fat Cat" or Cougar as my friend Dana calls him. He bit her.
O'Malley. This photo does not do his obesity justice. I will find the one I am thinking of and post it later. You will call Jenny Craig immediately. Jenny (said in Forest Gump tone) why is O'Malley so fat?O'Malley had surgery on his left ear, now he looks handicapped. No more perky little ears for him but let's be honest-there ain't nothing perky about him



It is amazing to me how cats always want to snuggle with the ones that hate them the most. When I come home from work in the morning I literally make a beeline for my bed. There is no such thing as a bad nights sleep on third shift! I don't even turn the light on-I grope my way to the bathroom and brush my teeth (dental hygiene is very important-you shouldn't neglect your gums either!) and go straight to bed. If I do not shut my door tight the next thing you know there is a two ton, fat cat laying on my chest and staring me down. If cat tossing were an Olympic event I would make this country proud! But I am saving my strength for the trampoline event!

Meet the only cat I NEVER threw off of me. His name was Scuttle. I am not sure in all honesty if he was a he or a she. I get them mixed up sometimes-just ask the kids. BUT it was my favorite cat and I actually liked it. It was like a gremlin. One tiny little ball of fluff. But I found him 10-0 in a shoebox by my backdoor one morning and I have never wasted my love on another cat since. I was trying to give it a little good bye petting and it felt like he was so stiff from sleeping in the shoe box. Wait he was REALLY stiff. EEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!

Well I am going to go to bed with the door securely shut and rest now. I may need to go practice on the trampoline later for the Olympics. Bye for now.

My Island

Sometimes it seems as if there is no light at the end of the tunnel. That the hits just keep on coming! Do you ever feel like you are standing on an island, all alone without Wilson or anyone and there is nothing for a million miles? The sun is shining and the waves are crashing but there you are, all alone.

The strange thing is I have a big family. I am one of six kids. I have a mother and a father both living. I have a grandmother who is still living. I have lots of family I guess is what I am trying to establish and yet there are days when I am almost certain that I am alone. Well, I always have God. Thank you God for always being there for me. Thank you for making the sun shine on my island because you know I hate rain.

I am really struggling with several things in my life right now. I try not to let it show but tonight I can just feel the solitude.

My sisters would read this and go into a litany of bullshit that would only serve to prove my point. I cannot remember the last time any of my sisters called me, except Mary. God Bless Mary. She chats with me on Facebook. She has a child's soul. My stress would collapse her in a single breath however so it is best to just keep the conversation to what she ate and how her cute babies are doing.

My mother has no idea I am having surgery and has no idea that she has forgotten two of my kids birthdays so far with a third forgotten child just around the corner. She doesn't know that one of my kids has moved from his Dad's house to my house. No one in my whole family knows that my kids are all taller than me now. Or that my daughter Mallory is suffering from hormonal sadness. Or that last week I got my hair colored and the lady turned it orange.

I guess one could say Laura, why don't you call them and tell them. They would listen. I know they would do that. Then they would go right back to their interconnected world that does not include me until I called again. I think I will just do like I always do, brush myself off, deal with the problems and be proud of the fact that I am able to take care of everything because it appears that my family is not around. They never have been. I will be 41 next week and I have done more by myself than any one woman should. Maybe I should thank them for ignoring my existence because I have become one incredibly strong woman. Thank you family!!!

I am not really as gloom and doom as I sound, this is a reality that surfaces whenever there is a tremendous amount of stress in my life and I wish that I had some backup. I look around and see no one. It just makes me wish I knew who my real parents were and why they put me up for adoption. :o) If you are missing a girl who is almost 41 and want to know where I am-HERE I AM!!!!

bye for now!

Hormones

One of the great things about having a partial hysterectomy is that you don't have to endure the monthly curse! One of the great things about having five kids is you are pregnant or breastfeeding for so long that you basically escape the better part of your adult life without having a period. So between the pregnancies, breastfeeding and surgery I have led a relatively good hormonal life!

I remember going into the hospital and telling the nurses that I was giving myself a birthday present. It was the gift that would keep on giving! No periods ever again. Of course, I am one of those really lucky people who never had bad periods. I never missed a day of school or had to take medication. It was all really more just the inconvenience of it all that I dreaded. One more thing to do. Not like my friend Amany. She has the periods that come straight from Hell. That is a post in and of itself.

I even got my bladder put back in its original location as an added bonus. This would be important later on if I decided I wanted to compete in the Olympics in the trampoline event. I never knew that if your uterus was pushing your bladder out that jumping would cause urine to leak!!! Who knows this stuff? Know how I found out?

Well I went to a cookout and all the kids were jumping on the trampoline and they wanted me to jump too. So I was all over it. I jumped and jumped and laughed. Just like a kid! Then it was my turn to sit out and I sat on the side and when I got up there was a wet spot. I wonder what I sat in? I looked around and there were no other spots on the trampoline. Hmmm...so I went into the bathroom to see if I got it on my clothes and there was this GINORMOUS wet spot. It looked like I sat in about a 3 foot wide section of something. So I had to pee and lo and behold when I got my britches down my undies were soaked. Lightening bolts struck and thunder clashed and I realized I had peed my pants!!!

Why am I talking about hormones? Because my beautiful daughter Mallory who does all things right except for once a month when she becomes Malaria. She can be a real pill. She cries and gives these looks that can turn you to stone if you are not careful! Once I was a Mom statue for almost a week! Thank God the curse was lifted and I was returned to flesh and blood. All the rest of the kids darn near starved!

I am making light of her pain. When in reality, when I started to write this post I was thinking about tucking her into bed. How nice it was when I sat on her bedside before she fell asleep and I stroked her hair and she told me she had a headache (probably from all the crying) and I asked her in my nicest mama voice if she had washed her face because I was concerned about the zit constellation that was forming in her cheek galaxy! She hadn't and so I suggested she might want to. Then I thought that as much as I was grateful for my hormonal free life, I would take all that pain and trouble every month for her if I could. She looked so defeated. Mascara smeared under her little bloodshot eyes. She has beautiful eyes.
I love you Mal-Mal! I love you Malaria! I wish I could take it all away for you.
Bye for now.

Me and My Boys

I have five kids as I have mentioned before. The oldest, Kenny lives with his Dad in Louisville. Kenny is 18. He knows everything. Just ask him. He lived with me until last year. He decided he didn't like my rules. I decided I didn't like that he didn't like following them. So off he went to live with his Dad.

Kenny is a lot like his Dad. Hot tempered, good looking, a pain in the neck. Just kidding. I am not kidding about his Dad, just Kenny. When I was pregnant with Kenny I gained 60 pounds! Which is amazing since the first three months or so the smell of food made me sick. He is my oldest but not always the wisest. He is extremely bright with an IQ of 145 plus so one will always wonder why he chooses so poorly. Can't blame the brain.


Joey is 17 and is the polar opposite of Kenny. Where I picture Kenny as a younger Albert Einstein complete with weird hair, Joey is laid back always well groomed, and mild mannered. Kenny is spastic with ADD and Joey is calm and OCD. I love them both despite the alphabet of disorders they have. Kenny will do any chore I ask him to, not always perfectly but he does it everytime I ask. Joey will do it flawlessly if you can get him to do it. Joey is also more athletic. Kenny loves to hunt.



Zachary is my youngest boy. He is 12 and is about to turn 13 in October. He has officially entered puberty, gotten hair on his privates which he felt compelled to show me. Not all just the top but it was still traumatic for me. I went off into a corner and rocked back and forth. The weird thing about Zachary is he went from a mama's boy to a sullen teen overnight. I must have slept too long. I will never do it again. Come back to mama Zachary. He is my sweet but passionate boy who worships me and loves to hang out with me. Well he used to.
Now he will even go to Gatlinburg without me! I love you baby! Come back. I loved holding them when they were just little babies. Then they became contrary toddlers. Now they are contrary teens. Ahhhhh the circle of life. They are all handsome and I am so grateful for the love they bring my life. I hope they don't terrorize women when they get older.

Bye for now.

Guilt

Why is guilt so powerful? I am wondering that. My daughter Mallory said something to me that made me feel guilty. My son Joey tried to make me feel guilty for grounding him. I can assure you he would have been better served to watch for pigs flying in the sky. I am sure the feeling of guilt is like a little pat on the shoulder letting you know you still have a conscience. But it sure has strength and reach.

I feel guilty about so many things but that is one of the benefits of being Catholic. Catholics have a market not much different than that of the Dow. It goes up constantly and the Church profits. You sinned and you can give more money to the church and feel a little less guilty!!!

Mother guilt is a guilt that has absolute power. You try and do what is right by your children and one minute you think you are making progress and then boom! You take the ham with you to work and you are likened to that of a mother who has left her children with a barren kitchen and taken the last five dollars to the family name and splurged on McDonalds by yourself. When in reality there was enough food to feed a small third world country. Mother guilt at its finest.

Can't Live With Em'

I wonder...I wa wa wa wa wonder.WHY? Why, why, why, why, why you went away...I love country music and music from the fifties. Nothing better to soothe your broken heart or make you want to run over your man in a pick up I declare. So my guy and I, that sounded kinda cool, had a falling out. It happens I know. I just wonder why. Why does it seem like men can take us or leave us?

I find that answer I will make millions.

Urban Myth Destroyed

Well anyone who knows me even slightly knows that I have this quirky habit of returning calls from the bathtub. (My sisters don't think it is quirky but we will get to that in a moment) As a busy mother of five, the only time I really sit down is when I am in the bathtub or the car. So it only stands to reason that a great time to give someone your devoted attention is when you are sitting still. Right? With me-good luck.

So one of the down sides to talking on the phone while soaking in a hot, bubbly bath is the steam. Great for the skin-bad for the phones. I say phones because I have gone through a myriad of cordless phones at an alarming rate. Let's just say that I have destroyed, single-handedly mind you the urban myth of what will happen to you if you drop your cordless in water. Here is what happens.....drum roll please.... Nothing. Oh, your phone is ruined. No grand electrocution-thank goodness just a broken phone. I know because I have dropped so many in the tub my kids don't even bat an eye.

What brings me to share this is I have just recently purchased a "Laura proof" phone! It is fully submersible and is a bright yellow and black color which makes it easy to spot under the bubbles. How do I know you wonder.....yes I tested it! Not on purpose of course. Never have dropped any of the eighteen million phones in the tub on purpose.

Here it is in all of it's waterproof glory. Made by Uniden and purchased at WalMart. What more could a woman want?

I personally like taking baths and my sisters all think I am weird. I have been known to watch a two hour movie in the bathtub -of course I have to reheat the water a few times. But hey-multi-tasking is a way of life for me. I work hard enough and I shouldn't have to stand to bathe. I deserve a break! Besides, my kids need help with their homework and I have calls to make. Thank you God for not putting cameras on these wonderful phones! Oh and thanks for bubbles too! Amen!
Bye for now!

Warm and Fuzzy

Whenever there is something stressful going on in your life, it sure makes you feel a little less stressed to know there are people who love and care for you. The absence of that is also remarkable.

I think as women we expect less care and concern than others. But it is nonethless disappointing when someone we care for forgets us. It is also amazing when someone you barely know takes the time to show care or concern.

I am really blessed with great friends. They are the family I didn't get to pick. My friend Amany sent me a text message today wishing me luck as I had an MRI scheduled. I was a little nervous but she reminded me to just relax and think of what I would do if I won the powerball. Random thought-It is always so important to focus on your goals and visualize them as if they happened!!! So no one that reads this will be shocked when I win the powerball!!!!

I am not as blessed with family that care as much as some of my friends and so I thank God for the substitutes! God always knows what we need! My friend Nicki at work had a birthday yesterday and her own mother didn't remember. I know how much that hurt her. So for all of you that have let a friend or relative slip out of your reach-go ahead and reach out-it is never too late! For those of you like Amany-bless you!!! We are so lucky to have you!
Bye for now!

Funerals-death does NOT become me!

When you die, trust me when I say this- You don't want me at your funeral. I just don't do funerals or airports well at all. The very first funeral I went to was my friend Mary Johnson's Great Grandmother from California. They flew the body in. Let me just tell you, I cried harder than anyone at that funeral and I didn't even know the lady. Never met her mind you. I mean not just a tear rolling down the cheek quietly but an embarrassing display of tears and mascara. Envision someone consoling the most inconsolable child. That was me. Nothing anyone said to me could make stop blubbering like an idiot. The question that has always plagued me with funerals is why? Why do I feel so badly for the people who pass when I never even knew them.

I found that if I don't get too close to anybody, including the deceased I usually can do okay. So if I can just stand like a statue in the room and not have to talk I can make it without crying. BUT, if anyone says so much as a word to me about anything to do with the very reason we are there, forget about it! You better have some kleenex on you.

It is the same way at the airport. I literally cannot look at anyone saying good bye in an airport or I feel myself getting choked up. I can first feel the sting in my nostrils. Then the burning in the back of my throat as I try to choke back tears. Eventually, one leaks. It rolls down my cheek and I try to catch it with my tongue. Then I give a good sniffle in hopes of sucking the sadness down my throat.

I guess I just don't like the idea of anyone losing someone in their life, even if it is just a business trip or a vacation. I know that the older people who have suffered are in a better place but I still cannot help but feel bad for all those left behind missing them dearly.

If you see me at the airport or a funeral, please, do us both a favor and don't talk to me!

Alpha Males

I am recovering from what I can only call an Alpha male nightmare. I work as a 911 dispatcher for a medium size police department. I dispatch for the fire department as well. I very seldom if ever, have any problems with the firefighters. The police officers, well I could blog just about the interactions with them and post daily.

I am a very hard worker and somewhat of a perfectionist. I am a Virgo and I hear that comes with the territory. I take pride in my work and I take the job very seriously. I have been on the radio when an officer was shot at and I have been on the phone with suicidal callers who ended their lives. Neither situation is one that you want to handle but you do.

Last night the platoon I work with went rogue. They were just indescribably rude, insensitive and unappreciative. I am not sure how to give 150 percent to a group of men that think collectively like a pack of wolves that they are perfect. I am not sure how to go back to my job and do not only what is required of me but the extra things I do.

I really love what I do. But more and more I find myself stressed over the way my coworkers are treated and the way I am treated. I get so angry when I hear the smart comments over the radio and see the snide remarks on our work messenger. If I could change one thing at my department this is what I would change: I would require all officers to be trained for one month in dispatch as part of his or her probationary training. This would allow the officers a perspective that is so badly needed. I personally have logged hundreds of hours in ride time with officers. I have taken classes that help me to understand the job and I know what they need sometimes before they do.

Too bad I work with a bunch of men who don't appreciate it. Bye for now.

A Few of My Favorite Things

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens....I do so love that song! I actually love the musical completely! I love lots of musicals. The Sound of Music is just one of many. I love to sing too! Now if you ask my sister Susan, and we aren't asking her, she will say that I cannot sing. However this is only because she believes she CAN sing. I hate to say it but she can. But so can I! I just don't sing like her. Isn't that why God made us all different? My friend Amany, whom I will refer to quite often, HATES when people sing around her! I try to refrain but every once in awhile I just can't help myself! My ex-husband always thought I sang well. (Maybe he was just being nice. I will have to make a point of calling him and asking!!! I will let you know the results)

I love a good book! One of the quirky things about me is that I read extremely fast. I have been reading voraciously since I was in the third grade. My first love was Nancy Drew. I read all of her books and even had my own detective kit. I always thought I would be a police officer which we will discuss later. When I was a kid I used to love to lift the fingerprints off the furniture with scotch tape. Lots of scotch tape in that kit! My Grandma Zannini made my little bag that housed all my detective wares! I really miss her.

I could recommend a good book or two! Some of my favorites are those written by Janet Evanovich. www.evanovich.com. She has this zany character that I know I could be in another life, Stephanie Plum. I love all things Plum. I have read every book cover to cover in one sitting. Of course, that is generally how I read most books. But I love her and I love Morelli more! Read her and you will too!

I love a good chick flick more than most. I am a sap through and through. My favorite website for anything to do with a movie is imdb.com. You can find any movie by searching by the name of the movie, a character, an actor etc. Plus the coolest thing about this website is that you find memorable quotes from the movie. You know, the lines you repeat for years after watching a movie you really love. Like me for instance. I LOVE "You've Got Mail" and it is because of one scene and one line. Greg Kinnear to Meg Ryan "So is there someone else?" to which Meg responds, "No, but there is the dream of someone else" and that line got me through my divorce.

I love stamping and scrap booking both. I love the company that I sell for-Stampin Up! That is another post all together! I love to create things-like this blog for instance! I love taking pictures and I cannot wait to get a camera I really love. Any suggestions? I love many other things but these are just a few to get us started.I love you for stopping by and reading! Bye for now!

Stupid People

I had fully intended to write about something more uplifting than stupid people tonight. BUT we all know how it is with stupid people! I am a 911 operator. For those of you who don't know, 911 is for emergencies! Not for parade times and not for trick or treat times.

When I answer 911 Where is your emergency? I honestly don't know why I am ever shocked but I am, each and every time when the caller responds "I don't really have an emergency" then WHY, why are you calling 911?

Another personal favorite is "I don't want to get involved" Okay, so why are you calling? I mean for me personally, if I don't want to be involved in something then my first instinct is to do nothing.

Tonight, I got a call from a man who didn't know who else to call so he chose me, the 911 operator to tell this emergency to: "Yes, I was just at the corner of Dumb and Dumber and I saw a deer standing in the middle of the roadway. He moved for me but then he went right back out into the middle of the road. Someone is going to hit him."

Let me just say this. HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF THE CIRCLE OF LIFE? Have you not seen Bambi? It is safe to say that on a Saturday night of a holiday weekend there is a really good chance that someone may hit that deer. What would you like me to do to take care of this for you? I can go hit it with my car if you are tired of waiting? I can send an officer out to shoot it. Oh wait, you were concerned for his safety. Here is an idea, call someone who cares.

I just wonder why people think that the police can solve everything. It is not like they are superheros. Some of these officers have a difficult time remembering their car number. Throwing wild animals into the mix is just asking for trouble. I feel certain that if I had sent an officer out to check the welfare of the deer he would have hit it head on. Then he would have asked, "Radio advise me again what the nature of this run is." And I would have said "disregard" in my calmest voice.

Blogging Virgin

After I get this first post under my belt, what will I be then? See, these are the types of things that go through my mind. I have been following several blogs for awhile now and decided to join the blogging community. I am not sure why but I guess that should not matter now. So here I am ready to talk to all of you about whatever crosses my mind.

For instance, today I woke up at 3:38PM. Oh! Did I mention I work third shift? Well I do. I work third shift as a 911 dispatcher and oh the stories I could tell. This job makes me wonder all kinds of things. But anyway, I woke up and was amazed that I had slept so late.

Random thought-well it isn't really random but the reason I slept so late was because I have these joint pains...elbows, shoulders etc. So I was told by a friend that "Trigosamine" was this really great blend of glucosamine, chondroitin and hyaluronate. It is supposed to help with joint pain. So I am all over it because the pain is really bothersome. I had taken it for two days and just out of the blue I start itching all over. It started with my legs. Well I figured it was razor burn. So as I am eating breakfast I read the label of the box. GUESS WHAT! It contains shellfish. Hmmmm. Aren't I allergic to shellfish? Why yes I am. Probably should not take any more Trigosamine. So when I got off work yesterday morning I took a benedryl. THAT is why I slept until 3:38PM. The stuff knocks me out in to the netherworld of unconsciousness.

Which catches us back up to I slept until 3:38PM. I got out of bed and threw on some clothes which were conveniently located next to my bed. On the floor. I left them there because I just knew I would need them when I got up and I wanted to make sure I could find them. I unloaded my car and kissed my son Zachary hello. He had just climbed in the house through his bedroom window. Want to know why? Because his mother locked the door and slept until 3:38PM. The school bus drops him off at 3:30PM. I am not sure if he rang the doorbell or not but bless his heart if he did I slept right through it. Zachary..he is another post entirely.

I have five children by the way. Yes they all have the same Dad and yes I was raised Catholic. Now that also could be several posts. No, I am no longer married. We will get to all that later.

My friend Aimee was in town this week for a trial. She used to be a police officer in Louisville,KY. Her husband took a job in South Carolina and so she retired from the force and moved with her family to the Charleston area. She has been gone for a year but one of her cases she was working just now came up for trial. The wheels of justice move oh so slowly. So once I raced out of bed I ran some errands-did I mention I teach rubber stamping? Another post, another day. Those errands were stamping related just so you don't think I am suffering from severe ADD! I probably am though. I finished my errands and then took off for Tumbleweed down on the waterfront. The waterfront is located along the Ohio River. It can be on the Indiana side or the Kentucky side. We share it! isn't sharing great? We all learned that in kindergarten. But this Tumbleweed is in Kentucky. We don't have one on the Indiana waterfront. We have them in various other locations, just not on the waterfront. I will post some pictures to go with this opening blog later today....Bye for now!